Chapter Text
"Stand up straight! That’s it… No! Not to the left! Now veer, slowly, slowly, that’s it! No! Arresto Momentum!"
We had been practising broom flying for a few days now, the last first-year subject that Maia hadn't quite mastered yet. I never imagined it would be this difficult. To pass, she had to fly at a minimum height of twenty meters, make a turn, and land smoothly. But every time she turned or ascended more than ten meters, she tumbled. The first time due to losing her balance, the second out of fear of heights. Even James had pitched in with a few lessons to no avail. He was allowed to give up, but I couldn’t.
"You seem to enjoy bungee jumping without a cord a bit too much," I teased.
Maia stuck her tongue out at me, but she was clearly disheartened.
"I’ve had enough for today. And I still need to transfigure my costume for tonight’s party. It’s going to take me forever."
"Need any help? I’m sure I can finish in under two minutes," I offered, mostly to show off.
"Yes, that would be perfect."
"So, what costume will it be? A bunny?"
"A leprechaun."
"The Irish kind? Couldn’t get any greener, Slytherin…"
***
The party was in full swing, the pranks had been a wild success, and we were all in high spirits, especially Maia, who I hadn’t seen this happy since childhood, surrounded by everything that contained even a little pumpkin.
"You’re going to turn orange if you drink much more pumpkin juice."
" Colovaria orange ," I murmured, without her hearing me.
"Actually, you’re already orange. It goes well with the green."
I expected her to get mad at me, but she actually seemed delighted with her new look.
"Is it really from the pumpkin juice?"
"No. But you have to admit it’s a good joke. I’m being kind."
"Either way, I like it."
"And I thought I could convince you to ditch the pumpkin juice and switch to something more... alcoholic. We have butterbeer or firewhiskey in various combinations."
I didn’t think she’d go for it, but she picked a firewhiskey co*cktail. And she quickly got tipsy. Just a little. She danced, tried a butterbeer, and then told me:
"I feel so free. I can do anything. I think I could even fly that bloody broom."
"Perfect! Let’s go! I’ll grab James and meet you outside."
***
"Are you crazy? She's drunk! She can't even fly when she's sober," James cut me off.
"And what’s the worst that could happen? Don't tell me. She'll fall. Again. And we'll catch her. Again. So grab your cloak and let's go!"
"The cloak? Maia's not part of the group. You didn't tell her, did you?"
"I haven't told her yet. Not without your approval. But she's trustworthy. I vouch for her."
Maia wasn't impressed by the cloak. She probably didn't know how rare it was. James looked disappointed by her reaction and whispered to me:
"She didn't say anything about my cloak. Nothing. Hasn't she understood that it makes you invisible? Should I show her again? How much has she had to drink?"
"She's just discovered magic, James. We grew up with it. We know what's ordinary and what's not. This is her defense mechanism. She acts unimpressed so she doesn't seem clueless. Otherwise, she'd be wide-eyed even at a simple colour-changing spell."
Maia mounted the broom with confident movements. James was already up in the air, giving her instructions, while I stayed on the ground, ready to slow her fall at any moment. She accelerated much faster than usual and soared to ten, no, fifteen, no, twenty meters and would have gone higher if James hadn't told her it was enough. Then she executed a few turns and landed smoothly for the first time. Next, she zoomed towards me like an orange storm and threw herself into my arms.
She managed a few more correct flights, convincing us it wasn't a fluke. She didn't fall again that night.
The next day, sober, without a drop of alcohol in her system, she was falling again.
***
"We need to do something. Otherwise, she'll literally fail the flying exam."
"And what else can we do?" James replied. "I've tried teaching her. If I didn't know better, I'd say she's pretending."
"Can't we give her a mug of beer?" Peter chimed in, bored. "It worked last time."
"No, she'd risk getting expelled."
"Maybe Lily knows a potion that could help her without any risks. Worst case, if she gets caught, she can claim she tested it on herself while studying for the potions exams."
***
"There’s no potion for courage that mimics the effects of alcohol. People usually use firewhiskey for that. But perhaps we could combine a few elixirs to achieve a similar effect," Lily suggested.
Half an hour later, she returned with a list of potential concoctions.
"We could mix two parts of Befuddlement Draught with one part calming potion. That should alleviate the aggression caused by the first. A dash of Induced Euphoria Elixir or even Essence of Insanity might help. The latter two require extreme caution. We don’t want to see Maia laughing like a maniac on her broom."
"Sounds great! Can you make them?"
"They’re quite advanced, the simplest one we only learn next year. But the steps are well explained in the textbook. When do you need them?"
"Maia’s exam is in two days."
"The calming potion and the euphoria can be ready within a few hours, so there's no problem. The insanity one needs at least seven days to macerate. So that’s out of the question. But it wasn’t a great idea anyway. We’re cutting it close with the Befuddlement Draught. It takes a minimum of twenty hours for someone skilled to brew it."
"Really cutting it close. But you can do it, can’t you?"
"I think it would be better to get Severus to help. He’s much more skilled than I am. And he works faster."
"Absolutely not," James chimed in promptly.
"I believe we should let Sirius decide if we ask for Sev’s help. He’s been the most involved in helping Maia. And honestly, I can’t guarantee I’ll finish it in time. Are you willing to take the risk?" Lily asked, looking me straight in the eyes.
"We’re not asking Snivellus for help. We’ll manage on our own. I trust you, Lily. And we’ll help too. I’m sure we’ll finish in time."
***
I should have been out there with Maia, encouraging her, catching her, comforting her, or, in the best-case scenario, celebrating her victory together, but I was too ashamed. I’d let my pride win, and now it would cost her the exam. Because of me. I’m just like my parents.
The smell of the ruined potion still lingered in my nostrils, its undefined color, the color of failure, haunting me. Lily, exhausted from the sleepless night, had called us selfish idiots and shouted that she regretted ever agreeing to help. Although she addressed all of us, I felt the accusation personally. It had been my decision.
In the afternoon, James came by to tell me that Maia had failed the exam. I didn’t want to hear the details, but he told me anyway. She rose unsteadily, not even reaching the minimum height, attempted a turn and lost her balance. No one expected her to fall from such a low altitude, they didn’t have time to react before she hit the ground. No, she wasn’t badly hurt, Poppy fixed her up immediately, she didn’t even need to go to the hospital.
Just what I needed, more guilt. I spent the night wandering the streets of Hogsmeade alone, without telling anyone where I was. I used one of the secret passages, risking exposure without James’s cloak. But I didn’t care if I revealed the tunnel’s existence or if my friends worried about my absence. Selfish as always.
***
She was sitting under a willow tree, head resting on her knees, gazing at the lake from beneath her brows. Always fascinated by water, whether it was a mere fountain in the courtyard of a manor, rain, or a spectacular lake.
It took me a long time to muster the courage to speak to her. I had my speech prepared, a convoluted excuse, on one hand searching for someone to blame, on the other hand trying to convince her to talk to me again. After turning back three times, I finally found the strength to approach and sit beside her. I waited, my memorized words ready to spill forth, for any sign that she was willing to listen. Eventually, I gently placed a hand on her back, and she turned her tousled head toward me, her lower lip trembling.
"Are you disappointed in me?" she asked in a small voice.
The last thing I expected her to say. I was prepared for another argument, for reproaches, I had my defense ready, a bit of apologies and many promises. But I wasn't prepared for a sad Maia who thought she'd let me down.
"Why would I be?"
"Well ... you've wasted so much time on me, for nothing."
"It wasn't for nothing and it wasn't your fault. I should have been there. If I had been, you wouldn't have gotten hurt. James told me. I'm sorry."
"It wasn't a bad injury. And magic is incredible. I was as good as new immediately. Only my pride was bruised."
"Did they tell you when you can retake the test?"
"It was complicated. Several professors wanted to place me back in the first year. But Dumbledore gave me another chance. I have two weeks to train. But I also have to start learning second-year material at the same time."
"That's perfect! You'll do great."
And I told her about the potions idea, how it hadn't worked out, and how guilty I felt for not letting Lily ask Snape for help. She forgave me for everything, almost happy to return the favor of forgiveness.
***
Two weeks later, she breezed through the exam. Lily had been right about the potion combination and, after a few tries, we nailed the optimal amount of each ingredient to give just a bit of courage without any other suspicious effects.
